This week I’m going to give you a break from my constant criticism of the narcissist Obama. I’ll do that by devoting my attention to the narcissist Brett Favre! I’m also going to make some very specific predictions about the 2009 Vikings season. Please don’t call your bookie. I’m an economist, not a sports expert! When the season is over, we’ll devote a blog to checking the “accuracy” of my predictions.
Three weeks ago when Brett Favre “retired” from football, deciding not to join the Minnesota Vikings, I told my wife that this was just a stalling tactic so Brett wouldn’t have to waste his time attending Vikings training camp. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this out; the mighty Favre has never liked spending time with a bunch of college kids that won’t make the team. I’m one of the few Packer fans that believe that Brett isn’t joining the Vikings for reasons of revenge. Brett suffers from a severe ego problem, which is kind of a psychological disorder. As long as some NFL team is willing to take him seriously he will continue to attempt to play football in the NFL.
When Brett finally signed his two-year $25 million contract with the Vikings last Tuesday, you would have thought that Minneapolis had seen the second coming of Christ. Purple Favre jerseys were flying off the racks, season ticket sales soared, and Vikings fans were gleeful, proclaiming that Brett Lorenzo Favre will lead them to a super bowl championship this year. Sportswriter Pat Reusse, on his early morning radio show on KSTP AM said of Viking fans, “Boy are we a bunch of bumpkins!”
Reusse is correct. It remains to be seen if the Favre signing will be as bad as the Herschel Walker or Dimitrius Underwood deals, but no matter how successful or disastrous this deal is for the Vikings, the NFL central will be a lot more fun this year for all NFL fans.
Here are my predictions for Favre’s 2009 year with the Vikings:
1. The Vikings will lose twice to the Packers in 2009. Viking turnovers and sloppy play will lead to a Packer win at the Metrodome. Strangely, the Packer victory at Lambeau field will be a narrow win, but a win nonetheless.
2. The Bears will split with the Vikings this year. The second game at Soldier Field against Chicago will be a grim one for the Vikings and Favre.
3. After beating Cincinnati in the Metrodome on Sunday, December 13th, the Vikings will go on the road to face Carolina. Carolina will smash the Vikings. Persistent rumors will spread about dissention in the Vikings locker room. Favre’s ego will be a big part of the problem.
4. The December 28 game against Chicago at Soldier Field will put the nail in the coffin of the Vikings season. “December Fever” will bite the ever-declining Favre harder than ever. He will sustain an injury in the windy city that will end his first season with the Vikings. Speculation will arise as to whether the physical aspects of the injury are sufficient to keep Favre off the field, or whether the old man is finally sick and tired of getting kicked around. It won’t be pretty in the media or in the Viking locker room. At this point, Vikings fans will start to feel like last year’s Jets fans.
5. At the end of the 2009 season the Vikings will release Favre. Brett Favre and Brad Childress will head into the sunset together, both unemployed.
6. This time, Favre won’t announce his retirement. Over the summer of 2010, rumors will spread that another club is interested in taking a chance with Favre, but this will not come to pass. Favre’s NFL playing days will finally be over.
On a crisp, November Sunday in 2015, Brett Favre will return to Lambeau Field. Brett’s number will be retired as he shares that distinction with Tony Canadeo, Don Hutson, Bart Starr, Ray Nitschke and Reggie White. On that fine day, there will be no talk of tarnished legacies in Titletown; the Packer organization and Packer fans are simply better than that. Wounds will have healed and foolish behaviors will be a distant memory as 60,789 enthusiastic Packer fans cheer on Brett Lorenzo Favre as one of the the greatest players in Packer history.